Teeth & Bones

Even though I completely believe that Beauty Can Save Your Life, there’s no arguing that some days (or weeks, or months, or years) are harder than others. The last week or so has been pretty grim for me.

I take my share of responsibility for that. I have allowed myself to spend too much time doing things that I know don’t contribute to my well-being. And I have dwelled at length on public tragedy. I have neglected my own decision that I was only going to spend emotional energy on things that I was actually willing to do something about.

As a person who sometimes feels burdened with an excess of empathy, I must periodically remind myself that feeling is not an action. Sympathy, pity, compassion… all lovely, but ultimately empty if they do not lead to changed behavior and actual constructive participation. Caring is not enough; just because it is exhausting to care long and deeply, does not mean that you have actually accomplished anything. (The same, of course, applies to anger, love, hope, fear, or indeed any other emotion.) Take action or let it go.

I know that this internal weather will clear eventually. I know that there are some things I can do to help it clear faster. As my dear friend Lynn says, “It’s okay if it’s hard.”

Sometimes the best you can do is acknowledge the harsh beauty of the teeth and bones.